Friday, August 20, 2010

"You Are Just Like Your Mother"

So as I get older I start to become more and more like my mother. Not that I'm saying it's a bad thing, my mom is a GREAT woman and I would be lucky to follow in her footsteps; however, it seems I am falling in her "not so good" footsteps.
Growing up she was a 'fashionably-late-to-everything' type person. Not because she didn't start getting ready until the last minute....NOOOO...she started a couple of hours ahead of time but we never walked out the door until the time we were supposed to be there or at least 5 minutes before or after. It was very frustrating to always rush rush rush. So I vowed to never be like that. Since then I leave my house in plenty of time to get wherever I am going even if that means going with wet hair or no makeup...as long as I'm there on time.
The thing that always got me about her was that even though we were running late there was always a reason to run back inside the house. We couldn't make it out of the neighborhood, sometimes not even out of the driveway before she was like "did I unplug the iron?" "did I turn the oven off?" and that amazed me. How does someone manage to 'forget' if they have done something and not just once in a blue moon...everytime?! I now know...
Last week Jared and I were carpooling to work and we had successfully left on time. We are joking and listening to the radio as we enter into "town" (which happens to be 15 minutes away from our house) and all of a sudden it hits me... I can't remember if I unplugged my straightener. I have a few quick seconds of a mini freak out while deciding how uncertain am I? Enough to turn around and basically go another 30 minutes out of my way (there and back) just to make sure it's unplugged? Well it's that or have the house burn down so we head back. I was officially doing 90 on backroads and cussing at other drivers. I pull into the driveway, run to the front door, unlock it and head into the bathroom...it's then that I notice, it wasn't plugged in. Now I have wasted gas and time and all of it was for nothing. I head back to the car and remember that earlier that same week I had gotten about 25 minutes from my house when I had to call Jared to unplug my straightener. So I asked him, as I got into our car, "when I called you earlier this week was my straightener even plugged in?" of course it was a no. Why is it all of a sudden I can't remember pulling the plug?
Well this morning I get dressed and ready and make our lunches and head to the car. As soon as I start up the car I start thinking to myself, did I remember to put on deodorant? I have now gotten to the extent (just like my mother) where I can't even make it out of the driveway. Why does this happen? Are we genetically programmed to be just like them? Or are we all really too busy now a days to think things through? Do we really live our lives on a schedule so much that one step that's different throws everything off?

Monday, August 9, 2010

B Double E Double R U N

So Sunday Jared and I are laying around taking it easy and decide to go for a drive. We started out just exploring the new town we live in and then it hits Jared...a drink would be nice. Well we have moved to a dry county (no alcohol sales ever) so we decide to head to the closest county from the point we are at. We know it's away from Jefferson County (which is where we normally go to by beer) but are hoping we are not bordering another dry county.
We set out on our journey and the first county we come to is Cullman County. Now for those of you who don't know...Cullman County is ALSO a dry county. We laugh a little as Jared gets out of the car at the gas station just to make sure and some real nice looking fellas come out with bandanna's and no teeth.
We get back on the road as Jared pulls up the GPS on his phone and we discover the next county road we come to will eventually cut us over to another county where we can hopefully get a 6 pack and head home. We are now hauling ass down this county road cuz we have now realized we are almost out of gas and don't foresee a gas station being too close and Jared comes down a hill and bottoms out my car. Now at this point I have turned to him and made a smart comment and then we laughed it off. Thankfully the car still works but unfortunately we still don't have gas. We are now going down winding back roads at about 60 miles an hour (that would be my husbands awesome driving skills lol!) and we come out to a main secondary highway. Now as we were on these multiple back county roads with no signs and a house every so many miles I start to think...if we run out of gas how long would it take to get to a gas station by walking? Would we try hitchhiking? And I then turn to Jared and remind him of every "end of the world" movie such as Book of Eli or The Road and how in movies like that...when they are walking and they see a house out in the middle of nowhere it tends to be the crazy country people who live there. You know...the ones who eat trespassers or torture you and make clothes out of your skin or whatever. So we have now decided if we do in fact run out of gas we will NOT be going up to anyone's house to ask anything, no matter what.
We reach the new county and Jared fills up at the first gas station but turns out this is a wet county EXCEPT on Sunday's. At this point all we can do is laugh. We get back on the road and try the next county over. Yes we have officially left our county and now crossed into 2 other counties. On the way to the new county I confess that my no caffeine thing (yes I have started a no caffeine diet) is starting to wear thin and I have a massive headache. At the next gas station we come to my sweet husband jumps out, grabs a coke, and a bag of my favorite chips (kettle sea salt and vinegar) and we get back on the road.
We are officially in the last county we can possible see ourselves heading to and Jared goes in a gas station and they do not sell alcohol. He asks where the nearest county is and the woman says Birmingham. First off I would like to point out Birmingham is NOT a county. And that's important because in Birmingham you have Jefferson and Shelby counties. Shelby doesn't serve alcohol on Sundays and Jefferson does after 12. What if we had driven all the way there and we didn't know that and we stopped in Shelby County only to find out no alcohol sales on Sunday. We would have been furious.
So sadly Jared gets back in the car and we head for home. It was a sad moment until we realized...we have literally just wasted/found something to do on a Sunday instead of just sitting at home and we enjoyed it. We joked and laughed the whole time we were in the car. Quoting movies and songs and all the other things that you do when you are with your best friend. How many couples do you know could spend hours in the car basically lost and doing nothing without fighting? and can actually say they enjoyed it? So thank you beer for being on our minds but not within our grasp on that Sunday afternoon.